I'm a fairly open minded, friendly chap. Well, most of that is a lie, but the point I'm about to make is still just as valid. I think Simon Cowell is responsible for the death of Christmas.I appreciate that that's a fairly broad statement, but hear me out. Aside from stabbing Santa in the eye with a bowie knife (which he'd do given the chance, you mark my words), what is the one part of christmas that Cowell could attack and maim, causing maximum repercussion?
That's right, the christmas number one. Obvious when you think about it, he's a music producer, try and keep up. This will be the fourth year the X-Factor winner has taken the number one spot, and I personally think enough is enough. When I was a younger lad, there was a lot of excitement attached to the Christmas chart, and always a decent battle for the top spot, usually between Sir Cliff and a random children's character, but that's not the point. The anticipation of the christmas number one was always the first sign of Christmas proper beginning. It was always the Sunday before Christmas Day and people country-wide would sit around the wireless, with baited-breath waiting for Radio 1 to tell us who'd done it.
As much as this is a real shame, this year we have a whole other problem. The Christmas Number 1 will undoubtedly go to Alexandra Burke, this year's X-Factor winner. I have no problem with her, I think she's an incredibly talented singer, but I do have a problem with Cowell's choice of song for her.
Hallelujah, originally written by Leonard Cohen in the early 80's, just isn't meant to be sung in the Diva style-e. I know I'm going to be hypocritical here, as I'm dissing a cover version, but in 1994, Jeff Buckley did a version of the song on his album "Grace." Jeff's haunting voice and beautiful finger-style guitar work suited the biblical lyrics and feeling of the song perfectly. It really is the definitive version of this much covered song, and should be remembered fondly by everyone. Alexandra's over-produced version, with it's Manilowesque key change after the middle 8 is going to be the first time a lot of people would have heard it, and they are going to think that that is how it's supposed to sound.
RIP
Can you imagine Unchained Melody being sung by Robson and Gerome? Oh shit, that actually happened didn't it? Ok, take "Imagine" by John Lennon, another beautiful song, with meaning and feeling, and a whole load of other emotions running right through it. Imagine that, being released by Jay-Z (Pronounced jay-zed), as a hip-hop track? THAT is the gravity of the situation.
Jeff Buckley's version is currently sitting at number 30 in the charts, and I urge you to buy it, and get everyone you know to buy it. Let's get it to number one. Screw you Simon.
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