How do they know?

Dog food. Not the most exciting subject.  But here we are. There are two types of Dog food.  The stuff that stinks and makes your dog fart, and the other stuff.  

My biggest problem with the Fart Fuel version is that it makes me gip.  I have to strain to hold back the cascade of Weetos and stomach bile from heaving forth from my core.  That's only the start of the smell-based problems.  Next you have to mix it in with the mixer biscuits. These may look like your favorite Golden Nuggets breakfast, but they do not taste like it. No sir. Then, when you start mixing it all together, the smell is amplified. Think of it as a smelly equivalent to mixing Mentos and Diet Coke. This further pushes the vom juice up the oesophagus. You may think that your troubles are over once the food is on the floor and Shep is tucking in.  But no.  For the next four hours, old Shep will be launching arse mortars at a rate the American Army would be jealous of.

Now, my real reason for discussing Dog food is the adverts.  We are constantly told that 8 out of 10 prefer this, and new improved that.  How do they know?  I mean, my dog has been known to eat dirty nappies.  Like a dog can tell if something is new improved.  This can only mean one thing.  Humans have tried it.

It's the only logical explanation.  And the worst of it is, to get to the conclusion of 8 out of 10 preferring it, 10 people have tried it. Who are these freaks? I wonder if that is a career they chose at school? Erm, I'm taking Biology and Chemistry. I want to work with animals. You'd bet your mortgage on them meaning vet.  What would the training regime, involve?

I'm at a loss as to who would want a job like this, but you can bet your bottom dollar they recruit outside dodgy fried chicken shops.  At least they know the people coming out of there will eat anything.